can u see that nothing will be the same anymore.
today was good. yet it was horrible...... i realized im not really capable anymore. everything i do, i manage to screw it up. i keep thinking id do something and stick to it but i end up juz screwing it up.
the movie had its up and downs. i had no idea what was going on. everything was messed up. it was my fault......i like certain things from where i stand, but half of me wants the old times back. i might sound ridiculously stupid and retarded right now but it all makes sense to me. i hav to let it out somehow. i dunno......... i seemed to be saying alot of that these days.... but i really dont know......you lose good friends and you lose peoples trust. just when i thought this was a great beginning i , say it again, had to screw it up................................. now nothing is right. nothing will be the same. everything i do leads to a conciquence . one which i cant handle. the thoughts are not clear so i cant act right. even if i put on a happy face, i think you'd really know if u look past that....................................
well . that felt a little better. i guess. but i have no idea whats gonna happen next. i cant talk about what i dont want to, and yet it feels like i must say it. eh... -__-....
im sorry for what ever happened, what just happened and what will happen. i apologize in advance. i know im gonna hurt someone else, but i dont know when,how, who or why..........
it sucks to know that now, there will be second thoughts to what i said. and even though this really proves some people......... i dont feel its worth to lose in the end.
messed up.
so messed up.